You know how people just have the knack of making u feel guilty through stuff they do , whether intentionally or unintentionally ? Yep , that's probably what it is now . Guilt. And i don't like this feeling of guilt . It's not the i'm a murderer yet i did not get convicted type of guilt , but it's more of the , what have i done to make u react in the indifferent, bordering on nice way u do ? So unsettling , feels as if there is something i need to do about it , yet there seems to be nothing i can do about it . Perhaps i'm too sensitive as what most of my colleagues in office are saying .

Guilt nonetheless remains a powerful emotion that can push you to do things you don't normally do and make u feel the way that you don't normally feel .Stop being nice to me and make me hate u . I'm an unbalanced cuckoo that can't survive when people around start being nice to me . I'll just made that way . That screwed up, illogical yet common-sensical way .

Perhaps i should go and be a cow . ( cow was the first animal that came to my mind. i'm a big fat cow with black and white patches . someone told me a joke about a cow recently , can't really remember it now , something to do with cheese .)

Sorry , scatterbrain syndrome kicking in .